Love is a Choice

Nov 9, 2014
4 min read

"Give me your heart & I'll give you my love."

Why are we always exchanging things, sacrificing things, for something that isn't even guaranteed. We give up our morals, our wants, our desires, our goals, our dreams, in HOPES that we'll receive something in return - love.

I watch people, confused with the definition of love, go carelessly through life, thinking they're doing it all right, not knowing what's wrong with them, blaming themselves, and ultimately hating "love" altogether.

Today's lesson? It's not love. It's people.

Love is unconditional. Love is infinite. It's irreplaceable. People are conditional, few, and replaceable. Don't get the two confused, because they are far from the same. Just because we were made in an image to love, doesn't mean that everyone will choose to live by that image. That's the beauty of this world, we have a choice. Don't hate love because the wrong person didn't choose it.

What's the biggest issue? Loving others more than you love yourself. People always confuse this for selfishness. You only have control over one life, one being, one set of emotions - your own. It's your job to love. It's your responsibility to love with everything that you possibly have in you. What the other person does in return.. that's THEIR issue. That's THEIR fault. Not yours.

When you give, you should never expect to receive. The saying isn't give & you shall receive. Love doesn't hurt. People do. Their actions & words do.

So again, why are we always exchanging & sacrificing ourselves? Why do we think that giving ourselves away, on multiple levels, will give us that love in return? The secret to love is love. If you want love, you have to give love. When you give away your morals, standards, your work, your dreams, your passions.. then what do you have? You're giving away who you are. & once you give away who you are, you can no longer love yourself. Once you no longer love yourself, you're lost & alone, chasing something that you already set yourself up to never receive.

If you want to be loved, then you have to just simply love. & if that isn't enough, then they aren't enough for you. If your love isn't good enough, then they don't deserve it anyway.

I know that sounds so typical & cliche, so let me break it down to you on a non-cliche, real level. I promised to let out bits & pieces of my story over time, so here you go.

Why did I start love over lust? Because people need to know. Everyone needs to know that lust will destroy you. It will take everything you have, make you sacrifice yourself, giving everything that's yours away, and it will consume you to a point that you don't even recognize yourself anymore.

I've chosen lust over love almost my entire life. I've sacrificed everything. I've given up everything I've ever believed in for a shot at someone loving me back the way that I loved them. & it nearly destroyed me, on multiple occasions, in multiple relationships.

It's our fault that our generation is the way it is. It's our choices to lower our standards & accept mediocrity. We choose lust. Kids today are raised to belief that lust is the way of life. The "best" music teaches us that lust is how you make it to the top. We are preached to about lives of lust, from almost every corner of the world.

I started this movement because I decided to fight. I decided to fight for love - for myself, and for others. & today, I had a breakthrough. I had one of the biggest ephiphanies & realizations that I've experienced yet. Today I said no to lust. Today I cut a piece of my life off for good, because those people, those places, they're not of love, they're of lust. I almost fell back into it, & then I remembered how long it took me to pick myself up from that fall. I remembered the pain that choosing lust brought. I remember how far down that path I went, how lost I was.

You have to be willing to accept a little heartbreak, accept a little pain, sometimes a lot of pain, in order to make it. You have to in order to be strong. & you have to be strong to choose love over lust. & if you have a choice between lust & nothing - choose nothing. Because at the end of it all, you still have yourself, & you have the man upstairs proud of you for continuing to climb this treacherous wordly mountain we run into every day.

Stop confusing love & lust. They're not the same. They don't even fall under the same category. One is good & one is bad, period. If it hurts, if that person or situation is hurting you, then it's not a circumstance of love - it's some sort of lust, be it money, sex, power, or greed, that has the ability to destroy you, sometimes to a struggling point of no return.

What's in your heart is what makes you who you are..

Don't give away your heart in exchange for love - you need it, so you can love back.

- Kay